I am tired!

I am so partied out...pot lucked out...salsa'd out! I love my friends...I really do. But, between the summer traveling and all the parties we have hosted and attended I am tired.

And lets face it, potlucks are fun but sometimes the different variety of foods is just not PCOS friendly.

Of course there is the ass-vise that I just getting. I mean really, I have heard it before people...its not going to change my mind, the situation or help me any. I know people think they are being helpful but it stings to know that people really don't get it. Sure, maybe I am ultra-sensitive when it comes to the topic of babies and my desire to procreate. But, its my desire and I don't feel like I should have to explain it away...or even deny it.

I know that I have posted in the past that a lot of our group of friends is a lot older then me. I guess that is what happens when you date an older man and inherit his friends. I suppose I should be grateful that my friends have no desire to hang with me (due to the fact that I am dating a much older man), since a true friend would stick by me. But, the downside is I hang around these people and have so little in common with them. I don't enjoy the majority of the conversations so I sit and nod and smile and pretend I get it/ give a damn. I know....I am so damn mean. Yep, heard it before. And the sad reality of it is that Scott would feel the same way if we were to hang with my former friends. We would laugh and talk about stuff that Scott either has no interest in or could say "yeah, been there, done that." So, I have spent the summer cringing inside, smiling and nodding on the outside wondering if I could change the topic.

I also wonder if the friends who dropped me after I left mr. asshole ex are wondering why they dropped me and not him. LOL! Yes, I did just type that out! I have got a text message or two from one or two people who "sided" with mr. ex asking how I am and what not. I have even talked to a couple of gals who pretty much hate mr. ex and can't stomach socializing with him now. I have even been told they "miss partying with me." But give the skeptic that I am, I wonder if they are being sincere or trying to get into my good graces to appeal to me to take him back or even spy on me. OMG! That makes me sound so paranoid. (For the record, I don't not is any way, shape or form believe the world revolves around me.)

Its true...I don't have issues, I have the whole subscription. But I can't help but wonder if this is as good as it gets...or is there something better? Better friends, better parties, a better me hiding behind my mediocre self? Sigh! Thinking about this hurts my brain...I need a vacation! ;)