Here is what I wrote "I cringed even more when Scott begged everyone to not remind me that I wasn't a mother. I really felt...how did I feel? (I am definitely going to have to come back to this thought since I realize that it's still bothering me.)."
I realized now why I am/ was bothered by this. I wanted pity! I wanted to tell my story and make people feel sorry for me. But, more importantly, I wanted to make people understand IF is not a topic to glaze over. I know that many people are not interested. They don't want to be educated on IF. The pain that I feel makes people uncomfortable. My talking about my struggles trying to conceive would make others scrim in their seat. They don't know how to handle my pain. As a result, people put on "kid gloves" and pretend that not talking about it would make it all go away.
I suppose that this was a result of my bleeding like a stuck pig or just my general bad attitude. Truly, I hate being pitied. But, mothers day was just one of those days that I wanted to throw myself a temper tantrum, stop my feet and shout "it's not fair!" Good thing that a little while later, I am in better spirits. LOL!
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2 comments:
Just having your struggle recognized is what I would have wanted.
Nancy, thats exactally what I want! I wanted someone to recognize my struggle. I think too often no being able to verbalize that causes this pent up frustration. That and the fact that I really diddn't want to bring anyone down on mother's day.
Congrats again!
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