Bad blogger

I have been a bad blogger. I haven't been reading or commenting on blogs. I promised a blog on reconnecting with old friends and I will...soon.


Tax season is about to start and I am somewhat frustrated with all the "great" changes that will be going on it our office. People think that change can be good but sometimes it's not the case. I would give more examples or details but talking about it just annoys me. Add this to the stress of saving every single penny so that I can start my IVF feeling good about paying for it and it just amounts to a huge case of heart burn. I am really looking forward to starting IVF. I have almost made peace with the fact that sex alone will not get me pregnant. Of course, I would not be sad if we were to conceive now. I find myself "relaxed" about ttcing. I know that I could do all those newbie ttc tricks (elevate my butt, use pre-seed) and it just won't work. So now I just don't care. Sure, every now and then I will pop open some pre-seed. I won't lie and say that I never think to myself thoughts such as "this could be it."But now, I say "this could be it"...and bust out laughing. I don't think of my pre-AF cramps as anything but pre-AF cramps.

Speaking of pre-AF cramps, they are killing me right now. I was expecting AF today (on my birthday of all days) and am happy she is not here yet. Now, a hugely wonderful birthday present would be a BFP. I have made that birthday wish year after year. This year, I faced reality. I can still have a great day despite AF.

Now I am preparing myself for a better diet in preparation for IVF. I am going back to counting calories and eating less "white" carbs. Oh yeah, and preparing myself, at least mentally, for my the tax season.